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Topic: Marry-Bang-Kill....Westeros Edition

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Wielder of the Baratheon BANHAMMER
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Marry-Bang-Kill....Westeros Edition
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Ok the famous...who would you marry, bang or kill...but with a Game Of Thrones twist!

Please mark spoilers

I'll go first:

Marry: Margeary, she seems practical and ...

Spoiler

Bang: Mellisandre....crazy redheads man....once you try one....(Just make sure to wrap the kracken beforehand!)

Kill: You'd think Cersei, but I think I'll keep her crazy ass around, I'll kill Yara, she is just so bitter!



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"Robert was never the same after he put on that crown. Some men are like swords, made for fighting. Hang them up and they go to rust.” -DN

Grand Maesterbator
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I would marry Ros. She probably makes a nice English Breakfast. I would bang Jorah. But only from the front. I would kill Anguy. That guy is dangerous.

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Mistress Of The Coin
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I would marry Jon Snow because he would be so much fun to currupt!  But once Ygritte gets a piece of him, I don't want him anymore.  bleh  So I would marry Tyrion, but he would DEFINITELY have to wrap his lance!  (I'm scared to think where he's been!) Let's face it, Tryion has everything a girl wants, but is a couple of feet shorter.

I only get to choose one I can bang?  Eeenie, meenie...oh hell, probably Jaime.  But what if he can only get it up for his sister? 

I would kill Joffrey.  Nasty little bastard.



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Mistress of the Rookery
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Marry: with a wildling (they don´t marry, no?)
Bang? Mance Ryder
Kill: whoever marries me or... LF



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 Messi has been and will always be one of my favorite players. It broke my heart a little bit that he didn't win today. Messi is awesome in every way. But Sean Penn still sucks all the dicks. Atat.

 

 

 

Priestess of R'hllor
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I'll try to stick to TV characters.

Marry: Dolorous Edd (hard-working, not picky, funny)
Bang: Stannis (because he likes tables) Hmm, bet you didn't see that one coming.
Kill: Craster, cause that's just fucked up.

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High King and Conqueror of the Seven Kingdoms
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Macha likes tables!!!!! Hilarious! It all makes sense now.
Marry: definitely Sansa, who else?
Bang: Danearys, our Targeryen babies will be smart and beautiful, but I'd only keep her as a concubine and Mellisandre!
kill: Joffrey, Theon, Boltons, Cersei, half the kingsguard, the entire Lannister family except for Jaime who will be my fool and Tywin whom I will keep around to amuse me.
That was fun!



-- Edited by Aegon the Conqueror on Wednesday 19th of September 2012 12:38:01 PM

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Braavosi Water Dancer
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Marry: Hmm... That's a tough one. Tyrion I suppose. After a thorough health check.

 

Bang: Just one????? No way. Hmmm.... That's tough... But I think I'll go for Jamie.

Because he makes me want to be such a bad girl!

 

Kill: That's also tough.

Spoiler






-- Edited by Tir Airgid on Friday 21st of September 2012 07:30:09 AM

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Lady Of The Blue Winter Rose
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Marry - Ned Stark, Bang - Red Viper, Kill - Walder POS Frey

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Rhaegar, despite wounding Robert, was struck down with a massive blow from Robert's warhammer, which scattered the rubies encrusted in Rhaegar's armor under the water.  Rhaegar died with Lyanna Stark's name on his lips.

 

Goddess of Tits and Wine
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Marry... Jamie .(He'll come good in the end ..) or Bron ! or Tyrion ! Tho I'm sure Egg would of turned out a good catch ahhh and Dunk bless him...

Bang.... Euron, Daario,Bron,Jaqhen, "Karl" , Dunk, Robb, Jon and probably some wildlings ...Red Vyper , Darkstar ,Tyrion , Tywin would just have to look at me ... there's more I'm sure of it ... Ha ha .

Kill ... no one I don't have it in me.

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High King and Conqueror of the Seven Kingdoms
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Yvy wants to bang half the men in westeros.
Wow Tyrion should come to our world, half the women wanna marry him.

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Goddess of Tits and Wine
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This is fantasy Aegon

 

The funny thing is you want to kill everyone ..wink



-- Edited by YvyB on Thursday 20th of September 2012 09:36:08 AM

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Knight
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YvyB wrote:

This is fantasy Aegon

 

The funny thing is you want to kill everyone ..wink



-- Edited by YvyB on Thursday 20th of September 2012 09:36:08 AM


 Hohoho. Marry: If I could Jon Snow and bang him too while I can.

                           Kill: LF or the other Snow



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“You take a mortal man, put him in control. Watch him become a god, see heads roll."

 

 

 

 

Lady Of The Blue Winter Rose
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YvyB wrote:

Marry... Jamie .(He'll come good in the end ..) or Bron ! or Tyrion ! Tho I'm sure Egg would of turned out a good catch ahhh and Dunk bless him...

Bang.... Euron, Daario,Bron,Jaqhen, "Karl" , Dunk, Robb, Jon and probably some wildlings ...Red Vyper , Darkstar ,Tyrion , Tywin would just have to look at me ... there's more I'm sure of it ... Ha ha .

Kill ... no one I don't have it in me.


 So much eye candy in Westeros, hard to say which "one" to bang.  So many good choices for that category.



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Rhaegar, despite wounding Robert, was struck down with a massive blow from Robert's warhammer, which scattered the rubies encrusted in Rhaegar's armor under the water.  Rhaegar died with Lyanna Stark's name on his lips.

 

High King and Conqueror of the Seven Kingdoms
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YvyB wrote:

This is fantasy Aegon

 

The funny thing is you want to kill everyone ..wink



-- Edited by YvyB on Thursday 20th of September 2012 09:36:08 AM


 Robb Stark episode 10 season 1, I identified :kill:



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Wielder of the Baratheon BANHAMMER
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Might have to revise the list once Ygritte gets to play this season.

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Banned in Six Kingdoms
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Fuck: Cersei. I can't think of a better rage-fuck than Cersei. My awkward attempts at giving her pleasure are her comeuppance for her evil deeds.

Marry: Dany for the dragons. Unless she makes me sign a pre-nup. Then it would be Val because all the other intriguing females are underage or Dornish plot fillers.

Kill: Jon.

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As soon as those cameras are off I am going to fuck that little dog.

Mistress of the Rookery
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andrea wrote:

Marry: with a wildling (they don´t marry, no?)
Bang? Mance Ryder
Kill: whoever marries me or... LF


 hmmm I´m sticking to me BUT I think I´m feeling sassy enough to give some to Stannis too. WUT.



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 Messi has been and will always be one of my favorite players. It broke my heart a little bit that he didn't win today. Messi is awesome in every way. But Sean Penn still sucks all the dicks. Atat.

 

 

 

Lord
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Well, i realized i had to delete my post because it was a FMK full of spoilers ...
So in a GOT view , let's recap.
Marry : Eddard (ok before his death, i'm not into dead people), the perfect husband (if we forget Jon snow's problem), not much of fun but this man is a rock.
Fuck : JAIMEEEEEEE , and beardy Jaime is cool and sexy as fuck (teenage slut moment, i'm ashamed)/ Tyrion (i think Dinklage is really hot and he can play the sassy guy wonderfully).
Kill : mmmm LF, i want to slap his cunny douche face ... And save Sansa from his perv views (poor little dove).

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Grand Maesterbator
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Ok I can no longer marry Ros since shes now dead so I figured I would change my answers

Marry: Cersei. I would be marrying into the wealthiest family in Westeros and she seems totally cool with letting me have sex with whoever I want. Which leads me to...

Bang: Mel. But Jorah has to watch.

Kill: Shireen. Consider it a mercy.

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Mistress Of The Coin
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My updated answers: Marry and bang Jaime, now that he's showing signs of humanity. Kill...anyone but Tyrion and Jaime. lol. But seriously, whoever that guy is who's torturing Theon needs to go. And if he dies in the near future, then Joffrey. And if Joffrey dies in the near future, then Mel.

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Knight
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Marry, Bang, Kill.....................Cersei.
Rich, Sexy, Bitch.cerseiwatch



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Grand Maesterbator
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Season Three new characters:

Marry: Olenna. "Now I ain't saying he's a gold digger...."

Bang: the two girls in the Same exact scene as Theon, without the cocksucker with the horn present and the loss of my dick.

Kill: Olenna. "Now I ain't saying he's a gold digger..."

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Lord Paramount Of The Ginger Minge
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Marry - Sansa Stark
Bang - Ygritte
Kill - Ramsay Bolton

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For Hands of Gold are Always Cold



 
Mistress Of The Coin
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Time for our pre-Season 4 revisiting of our most precious gem of a thread.

Marry: Jamie...or Dany
Bang: The new Mountain.
Kill: Toss up between Joffrey and Lord Bolton. I think I'll go with Joffrey. bitchslap

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Lord Paramount
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Marry: Brienne
Bang: Ros
Kill: Dany

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Outta here, Outta here!

Grand Maesterbator
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Season Four

Marry: Joff. If you want to know why, just ask FaBio he will spoil it for you.

Bang: Jorah.

Kill: Ygritte.

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Goddess of Tits and Wine
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Season four ?
Marry Jon (tho he has issues)
Bang RV ( oh hell yeah!)
Kill .... gonna wait and see who's left

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Priestess of R'hllor
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Marry: jorah (this time it'll be good for you, pooh bear)
Bang: davos .    (yes yes, stannis can watch)
Kill: dany



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Lord Paramount Of The Ginger Minge
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Season Four

Marry - Fat Walda

Bang: Brienne

Kill: Bow and Arrow chick who's stealing Strong Belwas' screen time.



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For Hands of Gold are Always Cold



 
Defender Of The Realm
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Season Four only:
Marry - Tormund if he would marry!
Bang - Tormund and Red Viper. Frankly knowing Oberyn it would have to be a threesome too.
Kill - Joff, no doubt.

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Lady Of The Blue Winter Rose
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Season 4:
Marry - Selmy, the poor dear. He's so loyal, must have that.
Bang - Jaime, he's been storing it up for too long. Must have a release.
Kill - Walder f&cking Frey, the cork sucker

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Rhaegar, despite wounding Robert, was struck down with a massive blow from Robert's warhammer, which scattered the rubies encrusted in Rhaegar's armor under the water.  Rhaegar died with Lyanna Stark's name on his lips.

 

Lord
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Marry : Red viper
Bang : Red Viper ("porn saved my marriage" vibe) and DAAAAAAARRRRRRRRIOOOOOOOOOOOO (at least kinky)
Kill : Jon "i can't get laid and i become boring again" Snow

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Je voudrais un croissant et une chaussette mignonne...

Defender Of The Realm
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@ Lady Stark: you know , the thing about Selmy?! I bet he's so uptight and restrained he might actually be fun to bang too LOL

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Lord Paramount Of The Ginger Minge
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I thought Selmy was a sword swallower or have I got him mixed up with Connington?



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For Hands of Gold are Always Cold



 
Defender Of The Realm
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Al, they haven't shown anything regarding Selmy's sexual orientation in the show. So one can assume anything ;)

Spoiler



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Defender Of The Realm
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Season 6 so far:

Marry: tormund
Bang: Swords of the Morning
Kill: Ramsay


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Grand Maesterbator
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Marry: Gilly
Bang: Yara
Kill: 3Eyed and Tyrion

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Mistress Of The Coin
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Marry: Jaime
Bang: Tormund
Kill: Theon, ffs!

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Priestess of R'hllor
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Marry: The Hound
Bang: Smalljon or maybe Tormund or better yet both.
Kill: Braavosi trendsetters.

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Lady Dondarrion
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M: JAQEN 4EVA ... wait, no, changed my mind. Beric Dondarrion, till death do us temporarily part.

B: Jaime ... (ETA and/or Arthur Dayne, finally we get to see who's the better swordsman)

K: Ramsay, as slowly & painfully as possible



-- Edited by HaiYouGuise2 on Thursday 9th of June 2016 02:53:08 PM



-- Edited by HaiYouGuise2 on Sunday 3rd of July 2016 11:46:02 AM

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Mistress Of The Coin
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HaiYouGuise2 wrote:


B: Jaime ... (ETA and/or Arthur Dayne, finally we get to see who's the better swordsman)


 This.  So much this.  I'm pretty sure I need a side by side comparison.



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Lady Of The Blue Winter Rose
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TormundsWoman wrote:

@ Lady Stark: you know , the thing about Selmy?! I bet he's so uptight and restrained he might actually be fun to bang too LOL


 I still like/miss him! Such a dear.  This season, however, def. young Eddard, that ginger faint and Ser Arthur Dahum, yummy.



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Rhaegar, despite wounding Robert, was struck down with a massive blow from Robert's warhammer, which scattered the rubies encrusted in Rhaegar's armor under the water.  Rhaegar died with Lyanna Stark's name on his lips.

 

Defender Of The Realm
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Macha wrote:


Kill: Braavosi trendsetters.


   that's hilarious

 I don't have anyone left to truly hate on  the show now that they killed Ramsay. Unless we talk Pycelle.



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Lady Dondarrion
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Right, Beric Dondarrion is going on the Marry list.

Dunno if he's benefitting from the whole Sheriff Dan Andersson thing tho.

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